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I had a morning that is very blog-worthy. Captain Fussypants woke up around 6:30am, his nappy was wet so I laid him on the changing table and took off his diaper. His bum is a little red due to the diaper rash he developed as a consequence of the medication he is taking that makes his BMs loose (if it is not one thing, it is another, right? And somehow everything is connected).

One of the best ways to speed up the process of ridding your baby of diaper rash is air…so I thought I’d give him a little naked baby time and didn’t put a new diaper on right away. He promptly peed all over himself and the changing table. Of course. So I cleaned him up, set him on the floor and proceeded to take the changing pad cover off. Meanwhile, my naked baby has crawled over to the chair, pulled himself up and turned to look at me. Then he pooped. And I so saw it coming. I knew it could happen but didn’t believe that it would actually happen. And then Mattias laughed. He has not reached the stage where he understands that he is going potty but he still laughed. The lil‘ dude laughed. Of course, he didn’t poop on the wood floor, no, he pooped on the shaggy rug we have covering part of the wood floor. And the poop is still loose, due to the medication he is taking (see how everything is connected?). It was as if someone took a scoopful of pancake batter and plopped it on the counter but so much more gross and stinky than pancake batter.

I swiftly picked Mattias up so he wouldn’t step or crawl in his mess, cleaned him up, PUT HIM IN A DIAPER and took him to our bedroom and gave him to Lance, who was sound asleep because he had been fighting the Malibu fires for four days.

Then I had to lock the dogs out of the room and clean up. So yucky. Thank heaven for the Bissell Little Green Cleaning Machine.

But wait, there is more. So now I’m running late but what else is new….at least I’m now ready for work, Mattias is ready for daycare and we head out…only to hit so much traffic you’d think it was rush hour. Took me THIRTY minutes to get to the freeway on-ramp! I couldn’t get on where I normally get on because the left-hand turn lane was backed up about a mile so I went to the next on-ramp and missed the left turning light four times before I finally got through.

45 minutes after leaving the house, I get Mattias dropped off at daycare and trek to work, but again traffic is terrible and the left-hand turn lane for my street is backed up another mile…me and left-hand turn lanes = bad luck today. I decide it will be easier to take the Macarthur/73 on-ramp and go around. But, duh, instead of getting on Macarthur, I get on the 73! So now I have to go out of my way to the Bonita Canyon exit WHICH IS A TOLL EXIT and I realize that I don’t have my fast track transponder…it is still in the 4runner (which Lance is driving these days) and I didn’t transfer it to the new car. So after digging around the bottom of my purse for change, I pay the .75 cents, exit the toll road and back track to my office. It’s officially 1.5 hours later than when I normally get to work and it cost me .75 cents.

But I wouldn’t change a thing, the joys of motherhood are endless!



  1. > Meanwhile, my naked baby
    > has crawled over to the
    > chair, pulled himself up
    > and turned to look at me.
    > Then he pooped.

    Okay, so you know how people type LOL and you know they’re not really laughing they’re just smiling and it defeats the purpose of typing LOL?

    Well, I actually, literally, really did laugh out loud when I read the above. A startatthebottomofyourbelly laugh that echoed off the floor and the walls. So. freaking. funny. With all the fires this week, it’s good to escape and read these escapades.

    Thanks, Cor, and keep it coming! :-)

  2. Having kids makes a huge difference. There are just not enough hours in the day80&23#;and when my kids are home I need to play with them and pay attention with them instead of doing housework.

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