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Baby barf

As I was cleaning baby barf out of the little crevice between the armrest and seat bottom of my son’s car seat with a toothpick because I couldn’t reach in the space with my fingers, it occurred to me that as gross as this was, it wasn’t the worst barf clean-up job I’d ever had to do.

When I was 20 (for those counting, 18 years ago and to this day, thinking about it still makes me gag), I had a puppy named Korby. Korby was a lovable troublemaker with Houdini-like abilities to get out of the house no matter how locked down it was and run rampant, terrorizing the neighborhood. Another trait of that dog was she’d eat anything. Seriously, that Marly&Me; dog had nothing on Korby.

So one day she ate a dead pigeon that she came across in our front yard, after busting herself out of house arrest. I didn’t realize, at that moment, she had eaten the pigeon so when I got her back in the house, I fed her and put her in my car to take her wherever we were going. Half-way to wherever we were headed (I don’t recall where we were going but I do know we did not make our destination) she barfed up – right on the center console in the front seat – dog kibble, and dead pigeon. Feathers, dead flesh, bones. Oh my god, the smell was atrocious. And let me point out, I was in college at the time, in Arizona, and it was about 1000 degrees.

I’ll give you a moment to get your gag reflex under control.

Well, I pulled over, cleaned it up best I could, then took the car to the car wash all the time thinking, “One day you want kids so you have to be able to handle this kind of stuff”.

And now, cleaning baby barf with a toothpick, I am reminded that so far, NOTHING that has come out of Mattias (from either end) has been as gross as Korby’s pigeon barf.

Life’s messy and you sometimes just have to clean it up.



  1. “Pigeon barf”


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