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He’s not a baby, Not yet a boy

“All I need is time, a moment that is mine, while I’m in between” ok, so maybe me quoting old school Ms. Spears isn’t what you expected but the toddler stage is interesting territory that needs to be navigated with patience by parents and adults (like teachers and grandparents) because the toddler in question really has no idea from one minute to next how he is going to feel. Is he a baby? Is he a big boy?

Hunky hubby and I have been dealing with this for about a year now. Fussypants went through the I DO IT stage where he’d have spectacular meltdowns if you tried to help him with anything because he was a big boy. But he’s since found his footing and knows to ask for help (on most occasions) if he cannot do something himself. And he still has moments often, where he just wants to snuggle on my lap and suck his thumb.

Last night he was exhausted and the baby-side appeared. When I arrived at school to pick him up, he, another boy and a girl were chasing each other around the classroom and then dog piling on top of each other in wails of giggles. Needless to say that by the time I got him home and fed, he was done.

So done, in fact, that when I tried to get him into his bedroom to get into his pjs, he crumpled to the floor and put his arms up and made the eh-eh baby grunts like he wanted me to carry him. I had his shoes and some other items in my hands that I was going to put away so I told him to get up and come in his bedroom to get into pjs and when I looked back, he was crawling. CRAWLING. He never crawls but there he was, crawling and whining and acting like a baby. He fell asleep within minutes of his head hitting the pillow.

Something that irks my hunky hubby (but for some reason doesn’t bother me – probably because I realize it’s a phase he will eventually outgrow completely and that means no ‘baby’ left in him at all and I’m not entirely ready to give that up) is that at bedtime and sometimes early in the morning, Fussypants will get milk in a bottle. It is a comfort thing for him, especially in the early morn. Some days, I have to get him up early for school and he doesn’t fight me on it if he has his baba. In it, he only gets milk and at school and at home he drinks out of normal toddler cups or even cups hubby and I use but late nights, early mornings he does sometimes get a baba.

Today, when driving to school, he made a statement. He does this often, just throws something out there, like it’s gospel. Today’s gem was, “Hockey players drink a baba when they take naps”.

I replied, “I don’t think so, I think hockey players drink out of big boy cups.” He contemplated that for a minute and then nodded his head and repeated, “big boy cups” like maybe I was on to something but he still seemed unsure. He ended up sucking his thumb the rest of the way to school. I gave him a few extra kisses when we got there, for being so sweet and cute.

I’m in no rush for him to decide if he is a big boy or a baby. The toddler stage is interesting territory and I’m quite content to take it one day at a time because no matter how old he is, he is always going to be my baby.

Kids grow up too fast these days, so I’m good with letting him set his pace. That is good enough for me.



  1. You are a good mom. I love you and your baby. :) You just get it and I love how you share it with us here.

  2. Thank you! :) Having friends like you help me to be the person I am!

  3. We all harbor deep dark parenting skeletons… Baby G had her last bottle on her 4th birthday. 4th!!

  4. Very cool story. And you're right…there's enough of a big bad world out there that wants them to grow up so quickly. Good for you for letting him ease his way into Bigboyhood.

  5. Korie, I love it! It is best (maybe not always but most times) to let kids set their pace rather than doing what the books and experts tell you!

    Kara, :) Thanks!

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